(1. Strophe)
Ich bin umgezogen, denn in meiner alten Wohnung regierte der Frust.
Zuweit ab vom Schuss, es fuhr weder U-Bahn noch Bus.
Ausserdem war ich frisch getrennt verband dort alles mit ihr,
ich hatte verdammt dort Angst dort irgendwann
einfach so den Verstand zu verlier'n.
Manchmal hat bleiben einfach gar keinen Zweck.
Es war vorbei und ich wollte weit, weit weg.
Die neue Butze war prima viel mehr Raum zum gleichen Preis.
Die Entscheidung war schnell gefall'n und viel mir unwahrscheinlich leicht.
Ich sah sie das erste mal beim Umzug und bekam keine Luft,
stolperte über meine eigenen Füße und meine lieblings Vase war futsch.
Sie war die personifizierte Anmut und trug nur ein Handtuch.
Schon war meine Seele in Geiselhaft wie die Landshut.
Sie lächelte scheu, verschwand in der Tür gleich nebenan ich dachte mir nur:
"Cool jetzt fängt mein neues leben an."
Ich hatte nicht gedacht das würde hier so krass beginn'.
Hilfe! Ich hab die allergeilste Nachbarin.
(Refrain 2x)
Was soll ich tun ich komm gar nicht mehr klar.
Meine neue nachbarin ist wahnsinnig scharf und ich feige Sau,
trau mich nicht sie anzusprechen sie ist so (wunder) wunderschön.
Ich habe schiss zusammzubrechen.
(2. Strophe)
Ich traf sie auf dem Hausflur meine Hormone starteten Aufruhr.
Ich blieb stumm, doch eines Nachts kam ich zurück von'ner Sauftour.
Ich kam rein, kotzte ab, wollte ins bett doch es klingelte.
Ich öffnete da stand sie und fragte: "Du bist doch single, ne?"
Ich sagte: "Jawohl!"
Es klang unglaublich hohl, mit einer Stimme à la Helmut dem Kohl.
Sie war echt entsetzt, guckte mich an wie den letzten Dreck.
Da hab ich wohl mal wieder voll in die Kacke gegriffen. - Sie ging weg.
(Refrain 2x)
Was soll ich tun ich komm gar nicht mehr klar.
Meine neue nachbarin ist wahnsinnig scharf und ich feige Sau,
trau mich nicht sie anzusprechen sie ist so (wunder) wunderschön.
Ich habe schiss zusammzubrechen.
(3. Strophe)
Ich wollte mich nicht geschlagen geben und kaufte 'nen Blumenstrauß.
"Im Anzug bei ihr klingeln, so tun als wäre ich aus gutem Haus."
Ich nahm allen Mut zusammen, klingelte frisch rasiert bei ihr.
Sie öffnete sichtlich erfreut und lächelte so als wäre nichts passiert.
Sie bat mich rein und ich folgte ihr mit klopfendem Herz.
Unglaublich aufgeregt, ich konnte nur hoffen das sie nichts merkt.
Ich setzte mich, dabei entwich mir ein Furz.
Meine neue Affäre dauerte leider nur kurz.
(Refrain 2x)
So 'ne scheiße ich schäm mich extrem, am liebsten würde ich sie nie (nie) wieder sehen.
Doch sie wohnt leider nebenan man ich bin so dumm.
Ich such jetzt wiedermal 'ne neue Wohnung.
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