Bits of conversation
Fill my head
Tangling with words
We haven’t said
Glimpses of a movement you once made
Knowing I could live
But dream instead
Wondering if you saw the part I played
Whether I’m the reason
That you stayed
Only half believing it could be
Well aware I want
What I forbade
Questioning my own reality
Doubting in my mind
The things I see
Altering perception fast as light
Do you know for years you’ve haunted me?
Speaking words you never could recite
Giving bliss as if to test my flight
All is but illusion
This I know
Yet more felt than objects in my sight
The world may see my skin
But just below
Simmers what I think
But never show
Lifetimes lived with you but more than this
Guessing where in your sweet dreams you go
Do you drown in memory’s abyss?
Is there music
In a voice you miss?
When you close your eyes do you relive
Each averted glance
Aborted kiss?
Do you harbor what you should forgive?
Search for signs
In every narrative?
Or repel all company save one
Who is not cure but palliative?
While it’s possible these things you’ve done
All too likely I’m the only one
And upon this thought
My vision fled
So I end back where I had begun
Nothing but the present
Fills your head
Forgetting more than half the things I’ve said
Shadows
Of a sacrifice you made
Knowing you could dream
But live instead
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Sullivan
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